I practice talking sometimes.

It's a little funny that way: I've worked over the air before, but I have such little confidence in my voice. I stutter. My lips or teeth or jaw have always felt awkward, and I'd even seen a speech therapist when I was young. The braces didn't help, and the full implications of "JAW SURGERY" hit me all at once about a month before it was supposed to happen. I'm also first-generation Canadian, and my parents have never been great with English. I don't know if that's why I took to music and drawing and literature and Math so eagerly.

I've always had a thing for expression, for communication. Anyone who knows me will also know I have a crush on Math for that very reason--among others.

I love that, in Math, any aspect of life or any thought can be modeled using these strange symbols and even stranger rules, both of which can be taught to anyone; ideas can be communicated, proven, or disproven, and even improved upon by any number of people also seeking to find the most perfect expressions.

It's a whole community devoted to perfect universal truths.

... Hehe!

Monday, December 22, 2008

Whaa?

Me

I go through this cycle where my sex drive is on full auto, just going like crazy; and then it calms down to the point where normally-sexy things seem... bizarre?

Like, right now, I'm in the latter stage and I was just thinking how mind-blowing it is that, for example, guys can get an intense feeling of pleasure just by rubbing themselves--and not only the feeling, but it stands up, it changes our internal body chemistry, pulse rises, the damned thing stiffens and then stuff comes out of it! I mean, people actually do this--and the seeming majority, on a regular basis! What the hell?

Cerebrally, yes, okay, this makes sense and is not really that surprising. But right now, my emotional reaction is "Whaa--?"

I guess this is a bit of a pointless post. But there was a moment just now where it just seemed so preposterous that I had to comment on it.

I'll add something less inane later. Maybe.

Oh and I came out to DW today. Cool!

--Charlie

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